“He buys tofurkey and thinks Tilda Swinton’s a babe. He’s into dudes, bro.” Brew Co., Brentwood
“I don’t mind looking like a Scientologist every once and a while.” Home Restaurant, Los Feliz
“Man, all these blogs are ripping the shit out of the new Belle & Sebastian album!” Book Soup, West Hollywood
“In moderation, cocaine is no worse for you than a salami sandwich.” Brite Spot, Echo Park
“Bitches come back to me like rental cars!” Vice, Hollywood
-The Neapolitan Mastiff
Exchanging Pleasantries 